Its just marriage!!

 An upper middle class north Indian household. A well-educated, well earning couple, their over achiever 25 years old son and their disappointment of a daughter.  The Disappointment, i mean the daughter (daughter/disappointment not much of a difference) is 28 years old and in sin. What sin you ask? Sin of being unmarried. Her parents wants her married asap. They started worrying about her marriage, the second she was born. She also wants to get married, she has been dreaming about this day for some time now. She has some atrocious plans which her friends doesn't approve of, but she has plans. What is the issue then? Where is the sin? Sin is in the fact that she has the audacity to find a man on her own. A man belonging to different caste and status which doesn't suit her parents. They have a face to show to the society after all. 

Ever since the day she told her oh so loving! parents, who according to themselves have never said no to her except for the kind of clothes she can wear, the kind of friends she can make, the volume that she can speak in, the nail paint she can apply (surprise surprise, she wasn't allowed to wear nail paint because she is a good girl) the college she can go to, the career she can choose, the city she can live in, the way she can spend her own money etc. Other than all these thirty thousand things, she was given complete freedom to do whatever she like as her parents were liberal and loved her. She could decide where to cry? In the bathroom or into her pillow? She could decide which  dreams to kill? The dream to pursue her education at all or the dream to go to a new city? But her parents wants what's best for her, of course. Anyways, we are drifting. 

Let's come  back to the Sin. Since the moment the girl told them about this boy, they have tried  all the tricks in the book to make her change her decision. They tried to lure her with gifts, emotionally blackmailed her, threatened her, shown the love that she genuinely craved for for all her life and what not. They gave her the cold treatment. Her father did not talk to her for months. Her mother only had hurtful things to say, her brother is a mute observer in all this. Let's keep all these manipulative tricks for some other day, this needs a venting session of its own.

 Yesterday, they called far off family members. She doesn't even know their names. Suddenly all these family members who doesn't even know which university she goes to or the fact that she met with an accident recently, or anything at all about her have decided that it is their duty to tell her how big of a mistake she is making. They suddenly realised that her happiness is utmost important and their heart will ache to see her in pain which is inevitable if she marries this guy. Out of nowhere these relatives felt heartbroken that she even thought of taking such a step. There was anger also in the room, how dare she !! They are her distant Fufa ji, tau ji, Chacha ji. Of course they know her better than herself. Of course they should decide the course of rest of her life. Of course they can make a better decision. Of course they want what's best for her. Of course they have been married for 100s of years and their wives are happy cleaning, cooking, catering for them while remaining silent. So Of course they are the best candidates to make this decision. Of course it doesn't matter that they have talked to her 5-6 times in all her life.

The best part? Her own mother, the lady who gave birth to her, well that is it, she gave birth to her, bought her things, reminded her that she ain't pretty, very visibly preferred her son, made sure to remind her that she wears glasses, is not fair, is not slim so won't find a conventionally good husband, called her a whore because she had opinions,  made sure to remind her of her failures and everything else that a mother should not do. Anyways her mother said, its just  marriage, everybody has to go through it, you do it as well. Do as we say, we are your parents, we have given you everything. Think about our honor, our status in the society. First of all fuck this honour, she doesn't want this responsibility, she never asked for it, there are so many other things to put in her vagina, honour doesn't feel good in hers. She would like to decline this responsibility.  Secondly, its just a marriage? If it is just a marriage, let her marry the man she wants to marry. But to allow a girl to make her own decision is like a kick on the butt to her parents. The thought that she will make her own decision shows that her parents don't love her enough. Because how dare she decides that she doesn't want to be submissive or be in a love-less marriage. This has been going on in the society since ages and nobody can question the system, unless of course you are a man!!!

Please stay tuned for daily dosage of 'swati and the shit she goes through' and of course her most progressive parents.